Night Hymn

sky

If I die tomorrow, let it be known that I never fell out of love with the world.

If I die tomorrow, shout it from the rooftops so that every beautiful creature upon the nurturing earth knows how much I loved them all.

Today, everything seemed so real.  My hesitant smile concealed an anxious urgency.

I worried and despaired, tossed barbs and took cover. Like a weighted lure disturbing the pristine surface of a mist-shrouded pond.

Today draws rapidly to a close. Sleep will come in fits and stops until the inky curtain is drawn. Night after night, I relish this hard-earned intermission. The reward of unconsciousness.

I never know if I will return. And if I do, I cannot know that you will have found your way back to share in the sacred dawn.

If I die tomorrow, do not mourn. Celebrate my release. If I die tomorrow, do not pray.  Give laughter to a child.

I love life and I love you but I hold these secrets close.

What fun is a game if you know you’re playing? What fun is life if you do not know you’re playing?

Contradictions fuel animosity. Animosity neutralizes animism and activates the back-up power supply of blind instinct. The marriage of cruelty and chaos.

If I am afforded another morning, I will once again choose a side, state my case and come up for air. From the clarity of the upper strata, the effect of my meagre bid for attention is invisible.

But to choose no sides, state no case.  To breathe.

Angels do not dwell in the ether. They choose no sides and state no cases. They just breathe. Their divine exhalations animate us and give us hope. They engage in cruel trickery.

If I die tomorrow, let it be known that I figured out the Divine Game in all its vulgarity.

And let it be known that I loved every minute of it.

We all did.  A life unloved would cease to be.

May we awaken and embrace, if that be the aimless aim of The Void.

Om Mani Padme Hum.

22 thoughts on “Night Hymn

  1. “Everyday, in every way,” — by reading your posts — “I’m getting better and better.”

    ~~~ om mani padme hum ~~~

    Had to go look that one up, Mr. Jewel of the Lotus.

    Wiki: “When you say the first syllable Om it is blessed to help you achieve perfection in the practice of generosity, Ma helps perfect the practice of pure ethics, and Ni helps achieve perfection in the practice of tolerance and patience. Pä, the fourth syllable, helps to achieve perfection of perseverance, Me helps achieve perfection in the practice of concentration, and the final sixth syllable Hum helps achieve perfection in the practice of wisdom.”

    > Night after night, I relish this hard-earned intermission.

    Me too. I have such fun dreaming; it’s like a nocturnal adventure.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you, Dave! I’ll be e-mailing you in the next few days because I just finished the portion of Shadow Shoals you sent me. I know you asked for brutality and I tried, but honestly, it was immediately compelling, entertaining and left me wanting more. But I’ll give you more detail in the very near future.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I thank you for reading even a word of it, Paul. Perhaps I’ve been oblivious, but where might we find the novels and formal stories you’ve written, of which you’re no doubt capable? Amazon or elsewhere? I’d want to reciprocate as best I can for any bloodying of your eyes done by having read my narrative.(grin)

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Ningun Santuario, a horror story in 20 installments, can be found here on my page and I’ll be starting another one as soon as my friend Tanya (theincurabledreamer.com) gives me her challenging parameters for it. My longest piece to date was a novel-length memoir. It’s ugly and pathetic and drunken and a little too brutally honest for me to post even little segments here. I have much to say about Shadow Shoals and it’s almost all praise save for some grammatical nit-pickery.

        Liked by 1 person

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